Football Creativity: America's Favorite Sport in Creative Quotations

The Lighter Side of Football


American football makes rugby look like a Tupperware party. --Sue Lawley

Baseball players are smarter than football players. How often do you see a baseball team penalized for too many men on the field? --Jim Bouton

Football is easy if you're crazy as hell. --Bo Jackson

Football is, after all, a wonderful way to get rid of your aggressions without going to jail for it. --Heywood Hale Braun

Football isn't a contact sport, it's a collision sport. Dancing is a contact sport. --Duffy Daugherty

I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first. --George Rogers

I wouldn't ever set out to hurt anyone deliberately unless it was, you know, important -like a league game or something. --Dick Butkus

I'd catch a punt naked, in the snow, in Buffalo, for a chance to play in the NFL. --Steve Henderson

If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead. --Erma Bombeck

If my mother put on a helmet and shoulder pads and a uniform that wasn't the same as the one I was wearing, I'd run over her if she was in my way. And I love my mother. --Bo Jackson

I've been big ever since I was little. --William "The Refrigerator" Perry

I've found that prayers work best when you have big players. --Knute Rockne

Most football teams are temperamental. That's 90% temper and 10% mental. --Doug Plank

Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein. --Joe Theismann

Pro football is like nuclear warfare. There are no winners, only survivors. --Frank Gifford

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent. --Dave Barry

Sure, luck means a lot in football. Not having a good quarterback is bad luck. --Don Shula

We can't run. We can't pass. We can't stop the run. We can't stop the pass. We can't kick. Other than that, we're just not a very good football team right now. --Bruce Coslet

When I went to Catholic high school in Philadelphia, we just had one coach for football and basketball. He took all of us who turned out and had us run through a forest. The ones who ran into the trees were on the football team. --George Raveling

You have to play this game like somebody just hit your mother with a two-by-four. --Dan Birdwell


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